If nature is beautiful, why aren't we?

Often we hear the idea get back to nature, perhaps we were never there. Humans operate above nature. We were designed to not fit with nature.

“When it is a matter of nature, we rarely find ourselves on familiar ground. At every step, there is something that humiliates and mortifies proud minds. A snails shell is one of the marvels of the universe.

The shells of ancient ammonites are constructed around an almost logarithmic axis, and even today Kitawans of the South Pacific view the Spiral of the Nautilus Pompilius as the ultimate symbol of perfection” (taken piecemeal from ‘House of Leaves’ by Mark Z. Danielewski)

There is an effect of repeating nature and how much beauty it can create, perfect in its consistency, and we humans fail to fit in this scheme. This is perhaps one of the greatest strengths of man, that we can be ugly. We can choose it and accept it. Imperfections draw us, define us, and create us. This feature of human kind, this flaw, it defines us, creates us, without this we would operate at the level of animals

Hitler had it wrong. How can we seek to eradicate wholesale weakness and imperfection, this is too seek to destroy ourselves, our humanity. Our drives come from out weaknesses. Our weakness causes us to fight against ourselves to seek improvement, to strengthen our weaknesses and to hide our imperfections. And thus we have created ourselves anew. Everything about me is temporary wait a few moments and I will be gone. Good, evil, sinner, saint, knowledge, innocence. With every passing moment I am yet again a stranger, yet still so familiar. Life is Pain, Time is Death, Self is Delusion.

It is our flaws that make us human, it is our illogic that makes us greater then the animals, it is our humanity that allows us to become Gods.

But still we wish to stop time, to mitigate it’s effects and to continue in a state of comfort familiarity and constance. Permanence is a strange idea that fails to work, it tries to defy time but time destroys, consumes, distorts, withers, changes, nurtures, and creates. This state of change is what gives hope, allows me to live with myself when I am not who I wish to be, and keeps me from swearing off the whole human race as a lost cause.