Tuesday, November 10, 2009

No longer Human

There is a terrible dysfunction that sometimes happens to people once we get behind a camera, everything that happens in front of us seems a little less real when filtered thru this lens. We become divorced from life, one step farther away from reality we become third party participants in our own life. Once you have a camera in front of your face you are no longer the same person, you become an observer not an actor. Sometimes all that happens looking at life thru your camera is that you act less, you live less. It becomes night unto impossible with a camera to climb a tree, too jump off of hoodoo’s or to pick up a game of Frisbee, however there is also a darker problem with the idea of disassociating with life behind a camera.

There are so many stories that we hear that are sobering in what we as humanity are capable of. I read this article today there are two videos at the end, the first video was interesting and worth watching. I, However, could not bring myself to watch the second video mentioned.

Imagine, to be laying there in pain, abused, broken, dying.   Fortunately there is someone else there, someone to offer help, or if it is too late for that, comfort. But no, no they are no longer human, and the last thing you see before you fade out is a stranger coldly standing over you recording your last breaths.

Perhaps it would have been better to slip slowly into darkness, Alone.

Without our humanity we are nothing.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

I wait

Forgotten, boxed up, missed for a moment. Ignored.

Then found, found but still lost, picked up, Noticed.

Taken to that place of lost founds.

Given a place, this home is not my home.

Yet redemption is possible.

A cursory examination which leads to a recognition, a remembered history. Oh there you are Peter.

So I wait

You left me and I had to learn how to live without you. But now I know; now I know I don’t need you.

Yet I wait

At the beginning you carried me everywhere. I was with you there and always. I am lost because you needed me, because I was always found. It took just a moment, a flicker of light, a momentary distraction.

Here I wait

Not enough value to pick up, too much to throw away. Only of worth for our shared history. If you saw me after so much time would I be more lost or more found.

But now I know; now I know I don’t need you. But can you return? Perhaps, but never again is there inseparability. We both know now You don’t need me.

Still I wait

Swarms of Thought

How many of my thoughts, born in a moment of ecstasy, fly around for a day or two and then fall lifeless to the ground. How much of what I think, of what I am will become just words on a page, heaping death in piles around my life. So much life forgotten and ignored. No one cares about these children of my mind. So much wasted effort, so much hidden self. How can I do anything more? Death loves me.

And now the work of resurrection begins